Welcome to Watch List, where we identify five things on TV to watch while you stay at home and tell your 5-year-old kid that she can’t wear her old 2-year-old clothes because they don’t fit, only to have that rationale fall on deaf ears. LET’S GO!
AMERICAN IDOL – 8:00PM (FOX) Oh ho ho! Lookee what we got here. The same week we find out that Paula Abdul is reuniting with Simon Cowell, their old show turns around and bags Lady Gaga as this week’s celebrity mentor. Gaga is no doubt on hand to plug her new album “Born This Way,” which will be released later this month but feels like it was already released two years ago. Now here’s where it gets a little weird. Your theme for tonight’s contestants is the songbook of Jerry Lieber and Mike Stoller, who wrote some of Elvis’ earliest hits including “Hound Dog.” They also wrote “Stand By Me,” “Love Potion No. 9,” and a bunch of other earlier tunes as well. So why pair up the undeniably current Gaga with a bunch of fusty, ancient material? Are all these songs gonna be reworked into dance floor anthems? Nothing about this makes a lick of sense. ANTICIPATION: GAGA!
MODERN FAMILY – 9:00PM (ABC) Cameron’s bout with the flu may prevent Mitchell from attending, you guessed it, a Lady Gaga concert. You cannot escape Her Royal Gaganess. Anyway, expect many a hissy fit, for Eric Stonestreet does them so remarkably well. ANTICIPATION: DOUBLE GAGA!
COUGAR TOWN – 9:30PM (ABC) It’s a Nia Vardalos sighting! And here I thought she had moved on to dinner theater productions of “A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Forum.” Tonight she guest stars alongside her husband Ian Gomez, a cast member, as Gomez’ sister-in-law. Catfighting ensues. No joke! Actual catfighting! That puts a whole new spin on the show’s title. ANTICIPATION: GREEK CATFIGHTING!
CELTICS/HEAT – 7:00PM (TNT) Kevin Garnett and the Celtics try and stave off elimination tonight as LeBron and the Heat hold a 3-1 edge in the series. Stick around afterwards for the crucial fifth game of the wild Grizzlies/Thunder series. ANTICIPATION: BALLIN’!
CONAN – 11:00PM (TBS) Jon Hamm and Miranda Kerr are your guests tonight. Which I assume means the show is having some sort of Attractive Person Theme Week. ANTICIPATION: HANDSOMENESS!