"Can you say lazy a** on TV?" the "Hung" star said on "The Late Show With David Letterman" on Wednesday night. "No, that's terrible. He's doing a lot for himself right now. The newest and greatest event in his life – I think he wants to be coaching soccer [for 7-year-olds]."
"You can't quite let go of the ex," Anne continued, telling the recently married Letterman to watch out for matrimony. "Do not go there. Don't get married. Forever engaged is a wonderful, romantic thing to do."
And the star said she can't escape from Lafoon, who she claimed wants her to watch him coach his youth soccer team.
"Because I'm so fantastic," she explained. "I divorced you! No, I don't want to hang out with you on Thursdays and Saturdays."
As for what her former spouse does for a living, Anne said she's the one who's still bringing home the bacon for him thanks to child support for their son, Homer.
"He goes out to the mailbox and goes, 'Oh, I got a check from Anne! Oh my gosh, I got a check from Anne!'" she said.
Anne is currently dating former "Men In Trees" co-star James Tupper, with whom she has a second child, Atlas Heche Tupper.
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PLAY IT NOW: Anne Heche Mocks Ex-Husband On 'The Late Show With David Letterman' (August 26, 2009)
PLAY IT NOW: Anne Heche Talks 'Hung'