Alyssa Milano's Big Book of Baseball
By JOSH ALPER
Updated 7:34 AM PST, Thu, Feb 26, 2009
Baseball and Alyssa Milano have been linked for a long time. She broke into America's consciousness with a role on "Who's The Boss?" where she played Samantha Micelli, daughter of Tony Micelli. Tony, before becoming a maid, played for the St. Louis Cardinals. Some say that girls look for men like their fathers when in their relationships, and Milano certainly has tried to find versions of her fictional papa.
She's dated a handful of pitchers in her time, and unlike Susan Sarandon in "Bull Durham," her charms seem to have a chilling effect on their careers. Brad Penny's fared the best of her beaus, although he can't seem to completely shake the injury bug that led him to sign with Boston for peanuts. Carl Pavano and Barry Zito, on the other hand, have self-destructed and may not be too far from taking up an apron and going to work in Connecticut themselves.
What's Milano's role in all this? We may find out in a book that's due out in a couple of weeks. Milano's written a book about her love for baseball.
Throughout all the shifts in Alyssa's life—the madness of growing up a child star, having to navigate life's most awkward phases in front of the cameras—baseball has been her one constant, a distraction that was always welcome. Whether you're already a fan or you need some convincing, "Safe at Home" makes a compelling case for why baseball is and always will be America's game. The end result is a unique and unexpected book that is equal parts memoir, manifesto, and love letter to our national pastime.
Craig Calcaterra of Shysterball recommends that lawyers for the Yankees and Giants read the book closely to find some actionable offense that might recoup some money they've wasted on Pavano and Zito. Perhaps she had them breathing out of the wrong eyelid or engaging in carnal acts that left them too exhausted to throw good games.
The noted author Joe Torre's written the foreward, so we may learn that A-Rod used to obsessively watch reruns of "Charmed" when he wasn't stalking Derek Jeter and Milano promises to share her thoughts on steroids in baseball. Barry Bonds' privates may not be admissable in court, let's hope that the intimate details of Penny, Pavano and Zito are also left to the imagination.
Josh Alper is a writer living in New York City and is a contributor to FanHouse.com and ProFootballTalk.com in addition to his duties for NBCNewYork.com.
Copyright NBC Local Media
First Published: Feb 26, 2009 5:51 AM PST
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