Turns out, we can't help it.
We men, we just have to look at women. This stunning news comes to us via a serious academic study done by Dr. Louann Brizendine, a member of the National Board of Medical Examiners. She says, and I'm quoting here, "They have to check out the goods."
By "goods," in case you were wondering, Brizendine means "breasts." As in, her "Man trance: That glazed-eyed look a man gets when he sees breasts." The good doctor says we men just can't help it. Testosterone production turns us into shameless gawkers, and there's not much we can do about it.
Until we have children.
Brizendine's research also shows that when a man gets someone pregnant, his mate gives out pheromones that actually cut his testosterone production by 30 percent. (Insert joke about guys with kids here.) This, she says, actually makes men better fathers - presumably, because we can concentrate, at least for a few minutes at a time, on something other than "the goods."
Brizendine, who's new book is called "The Male Brain," says the best way for women to deal with what they've known all this time is to just understand that "we can't blame a guy for being a guy." If your man has the occasional wandering eye, it doesn't necessarily make him a bad mate, just a regular guy.
For some reason, Brizendine's study doesn't address gay men, but maybe we're all wired to look at "the goods," wherever -- and from whomever -- they're flashed.
Men are just going to look, and stare. It's built in. We're supposed to do it. It's natural. Need any more excuses, guys? Just remember, when we do have kids, stare at them, too. It's also natural, and when we do that, we'll get praise.
Scott Budman, like Dr. Brizendine, is merely reporting this as a serious academic study.