Welcome to Watch List, where we identify five things on TV that may be worth postponing that crucial health care reconciliation vote. LET’S GO!
THE MENTALIST – 10:00PM (CBS)
A scientist is exposed to a deadly toxin. And, in shocking twist, that toxin turns out to come from INSIDE SIMON BAKER’S DRESS VEST. Surely, you know someone who wore dress vests that often never turns out to be what he seems. ANTICIPATION: ARGYLE!
THE OFFICE – 9:00PM (NBC)
Andy and Erin finally go out on their first date. Well, that took long enough. I haven’t seen a flirtation this drawn out since Kevin Arnold and Winnie Cooper. They had the excuse of being, you know, children. Erin and Andy? Not so much. Get your act together, people. Also, this show is now almost exclusively dependent at all times on Rainn Wilson being on camera. When there’s no Schrute around, we all suffer. ANTICIPATION: IT’S BEET SUGAR AND IT’S DELICIOUS
SOBER HOUSE WITH DR. DREW – 10:00PM (VH1)
It’s the premiere of VH1’s “Celebrity Rehab” spinoff, in which a bunch of newly rehabbed celebrities live together in hopes of staying sober. Among those trapped inside are Andy Dick, Rodney King, and Steven Adler. I assume the joy in watching this show is not seeing these celebrities triumph over addiction, but simply sitting back and waiting for them to crack. Come on, Dick! You know you can’t resist this gas can I put out for you! ANTICIPATION: RELAPSE!
DESIGN FREAK: THE CHRISTOPHER BARSON PROJECT – 8:00PM (Fine Living)
It’s just like the Alan Parsons Project, only it features an outspoken designer reviving homes in dire need of transformation. HE IS THE EYE IN THE SKY! ANTICIPATION: FABOO!
PARKS AND RECREATION – 8:30PM (NBC)
Mark refuses to bend rules for Ron Swanson. And this is where I again implore you to watch the finest comedy on network television. ANTICIPATION: SWANSON MUSTACHE!