Originally appeared on E! Online
Ryan Reynolds won't fall for this autumnal activity.
The "Deadpool" star — who shares kids James, 9, Inez, 7, Betty, and son Olin, 19 months, with wife Blake Lively — didn't hold back his thoughts about taking his children and their friends to the local pumpkin patch, joking that it's the place "where joy goes to die."
"Of course I wanna take you and your sister to the pumpkin patch," he quipped in a conversation with his daughters posted on Instagram Story Oct. 4. "Sorry, what now? You want to bring little Brandon from school? The one who can't modulate the volume of his voice? Or the other Brandon who always has a communicable disease and once wiped his nose on your hair?"
To Reynolds' surprise, there was actually a "THIRD Brandon" who wanted to tag along.
"Halle-f-----g-BOOYA!" he shared in his signature sarcasm. "And they said it couldn't be done!"
Since the 47-year-old didn't have a gourd feeling about this excursion, he joked, "I'm gonna see if another parent can join in case I need to head home and feed the cat. And yes I'm aware and I will GET a f-----g cat."
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He added in his conversation with the girls, "Please velcro your shoes and hop in the car."
And for Reynolds, becoming a dad has made him into somewhat of a pushover. Compared to his own upbringing, Reynolds recently joked that his kids are living on "Easy Street."
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"Parents today are so different," he admitted during HubSpot's INBOUND tech conference in September. "We're so soft."
Still, Reynolds believes parenthood is "the best thing that ever happened to me." As he explained on the "Not Skinny But Not Fat" podcast in July, "Embrace the chaos."
"We have four kids. Nothing’s going to be tidy ever again," the "Free Guy" actor continued. "It will, though, when they all leave the house."
Noting that there's only a certain amount of time before his kids grow up and move out, he added of this precious era, "That is a fleeting thing. Not an infinite resource."