Charlie Sheen Thrilled About “Men” Funeral

The notion of "shrouded in secrecy" is a joke in the internet age, so it's no surprise that the "surprise" season premiere of "Two and a Half Men" has been let out of the bag.

The ninth season of the CBS sitcom will open a sure-fire laugh machine: a funeral. But not just any funeral, the funeral for - yes, you guessed it - Charlie Sheen's Charlie Harper.

What will follow, according to reports, is that Harper's beach house will go up for sale, and a parade of real-life celebrities will pop in and check it out. Ashton Kutcher's "sad billionaire" character will be one of the prospective buyers, and he'll end up buying what we assume is a fully-furnished house complete with couch, bedset, fridge, and Jon Cryer and Angus T. Jones.

"Men" creator Chuck Lorre, who publicly battled Sheen after the actor left the show, is said to have taken great joy in killing Sheen's character. Less surprising, though, is how excited Sheen is.

Speaking to his second home, Sheen enthused: “I have always been told that I have nine lives. So it is going to be amazing to witness my own funeral, which is clearly a win/win situation because Ashton has just given me a 10th."

Sheen, of course, is hard at work developing a starring vehicle for himself - a series adaptation of the Adam Sandler/Jack Nicholson comedy "Anger Management." So far, there is no network attached to the project.

Selected Reading: MSNBC, Deadline, TMZ

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