“Green Lantern” Basically Naked But for Bulging Codpiece

The "Green Lantern" trailer has dropped, officially kicking off a six-month onslaught of clips, pics and teasers. We like much of what we saw, but we do have some questions and concerns:

News that Ryan Reynolds would be sporting a motion-capture suit for his scenes as Green Lantern made us nervous, and now we know why--GL essentially looks like he's wearing nothing but one of Larry Blackmon's old codpieces (or should the plural be "codpie"?). Don't get us wrong, Mr. Reynolds has a magnificent body, one that mocks the fleshy donut around our midsection. But remember how uncomfortable Batman's nipples made you?

Peter Sarsgaard looks great as super villain Hector Hammond, especially after his head gets all gigantic and gross. Unfortunately, the trailer doesn't tell us anything about Hammond or the plot of the film. All we get is a synopsis of Hal Jordan's origin story, but there's no context as to who or what he'll battle.

And we prefer Blake Livley as a blonde.

"Green Lantern" arrives June 17.

In other Ryan Reynolds news, he was today named Sexiest an Alive by PEOPLE magazine, and will be feted tonight by Kim Kardashian. The honor comes on the heels of his wife, Scarlett Johansson, being named GQ's Babe of the Year. Now if only they'd have a kid so we can crown it Baby of the Year.

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