Thursday Watch List: Lakers! Celtics! Boats! Housewives!

Welcome to Watch List, where we identify five things on TV to watch while you stay at home and prepare for the World Cup starting tomorrow. Are you sufficiently prepared? Do you have food and beer representing all 32 teams ready at your disposal? Beer from Cameroon? Cheese from France? Adult entertainment from Japan? Get on it, mister! LET’S GO!

LAKERS/CELTICS – 9:00PM (ABC) Usually, it’s the odd numbered games that are considered most pivotal in a seven-game series. Ah, but this evening’s Game 4 may be the pivotalest game of all! (NOTE: It’s the Finals. They’re ALL pivotal). Anyway, if Boston loses to LA at home tonight and LA takes a 3-1 lead, you can pretty much mark down the series as over. But if Boston pulls it out, we’re back to even stevens and that sets up an extremely tense final two or three games to decide the title. Bold prediction: Boston wins, and then someone throw up on Newbury Street. I suppose the latter will happen regardless of the end result. ANTICIPATION: FEVERISH!

BETHENNY GETTING MARRIED? – 10:00PM (Bravo – an NBC/Universal network) The real housewife gets her own series on Bravo. Watch in rapture as Bethenny sits on a chaise lounge, eats bon bons, and watches soap operas. Very productive human beings, these housewives. ANTICIPATION: SNOTTY!

WORLD’S LARGEST CRUISE SHIP – 10:00PM (NatGeo – an NBC/Universal network) It’s so big, they can actually hold NASCAR races on it. Actually, that’s not true at all. Still, putting stock car races on a giant boat is an idea whose time has come. One big wave, and you got yourself the flaming seawreck you’ve always wanted to see. Anyway, take a virtual tour of this massive haven for old people and seaborne viruses. Kathie Lee Gifford sings at dinner! ANTICIPATION: WATCH OUT FOR THAT ICEBERG!

THE COMMITMENTS – 8:00PM (FOX Movie Channel) Still holds up after all these years. Take time to revisit one of the dirtiest musical comedies of all time. IT’S IMELDA QUIRK’S ARSE OUT ME WINDOW!! ANTICIPATION: AND AND EFFING AND?!

THE OCD PROJECT – 10:00PM (VH1) Tonight on this study of people with obsessive compulsive disorder, the group members are forbidden from showering or washing their hands. Uh… isn’t this a massive over correction? Showering is okay. We want you to shower. No need to ring the doorbell 100 times, muchacho. But by all means, delouse yourself. ANTICIPATION: STARTS AT 10PM SHARP AND DO NOT BE LATE OR ELSE THE UNIVERSE WILL COLLAPSE

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