Reuben Foster's case is just the latest in a string of incidents involving 49ers, as well as other NFL players, arrested for domestic violence. But so often, all the focus is on the players, with little attention given to the victims.
Kendra Scott, the ex-fiancee of former 49er Ray McDonald, has strong, mixed feelings about a domestic violence case involving yet another 49ers player. McDonald was arrested for violating a restraining order in 2015.
Scott also is the mother of McDonald's child. She said she can’t talk about a civil suit she filed against McDonald, but she sympathizes with the woman in the Foster incident.
"I would say speak your truth; don’t worry about what the outsiders say," Scott said.
Ruth Patrick, founder of Los Altos-based Women of Silicon Valley, a group for domestic violence victims, applauds police for swift action in arresting Foster and confiscating his firearms.
"Domestic violence in combination with guns becomes a very, very dangerous issue for the life of the woman who is involved in an abusive relationship," Patrick said.
Patrick believes the #MeToo and #TimesUp movements will help the victim with support. But she’s concerned women who were involved in earlier cases, such as Kendra, will fall between the cracks.
"They almost become martyrs to the movement," she said. "But if we can go back to Kendra and hear her story again, see how it aligns with the current story that’s come out."
"People see bruises, and that’s what they see," Scott said. "They don’t see the aftermath of those bruises. Once the bruises heal, you still have a scar. That’s with you forever."