Down Economy Creates Market for Ghetto Limousine

Oakland man offers luxury on the cheap

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    You could be rolling around town in style in Henry Daniels ghetto limousine.

    Getting around San Francisco poses quite the dilemma -- cabs make you feel like an a-hole paying exorbitant rates for short rides, while limo service makes you feel like an a-hole paying exorbitant rates to feel like an a-hole.

    Ride with class while feeling the blissful contentment of cheapskatedom, in The Limousine.

    Because he heard your penniless cries, Oaklander Henry Daniels bought a white 1996 stretch Lincoln limo to use as the greatest roving by-the-hour ride ever, dispensing his own brand of cut-rate luxury to people who would like to cheaply feign importance.

    Since you're one of those people, just ring Henry at least a couple hours before your escapade (or a day before to be safer) and give him your pickup point/group size (7=legal max).

    He will then give you a fully-negotiable quote no higher than $60 an hour, and if you're riding for 3 plus hours, stock the ride with your beverage of choice, be it bubbly, a case of Hamm's, or Yoo-hoo on trips of any length.

    Inside, there's the necessary archaic equipment to let you flavor the journey with your audio cassettes and/or VHS tapes, plus Henry's co-pilot, a white Pomeranian named Hip, who is fond of riding both in front and back, potentially making playing your Raw Doggin' 9 video suuuuper awkward.

    Additionally, you can impromptu-buzz Henry at any point in the night, and if free, he'll offer a single ride on the cheap, for exampple $15 will get you from the Mission to North Beach, where you'll be faced with yet another dilemma -- call it a night, or pay exorbitant rates for the shortest of rides at Little Darlings.